Simian Sculling

Just some apes in boats.

Rowing the Cook Strait

Also known as Te Moana-o-Raukawa, which is probably better than naming it after a colonizer.

Dates: 2026-05-12 – Present

Meters rowed: 36,214

Total meters: 22,722.0

Completion Percentage: 100.0%

Name Meters Rowed % of Total Time Rowed Calories Burned
Jim Chimpsky 17,021 74.91% 1h 42m 42s 879
Oar-angutan 12,161 53.52% 1h 10m 16s 622
Ham the Ast-row Chimp 5,000 22.01% 0h 24m 16s 280
Mo Monkeys Mo Problems 2,032 8.94% 0h 10m 02s 110

Circumnavigating the Globe like Magellan

Will we mutiny as well?

Dates: 2026-04-17 – Present

Meters rowed: 197,977

Total meters: 56,478,072.1

Completion Percentage: 0.35%

Name Meters Rowed % of Total Time Rowed Calories Burned
Ham the Ast-row Chimp 88,772 0.16% 8h 37m 24s 4,867
Jim Chimpsky 75,206 0.13% 8h 14m 58s 3,734
Oar-angutan 25,409 0.04% 2h 30m 52s 1,292
Mo Monkeys Mo Problems 8,590 0.02% 0h 45m 13s 450

Archive

Rowing the North Channel

Also known as the Sruth na Maoile or the Sheuch.

Dates: 2026-05-04 – 2026-05-11

Meters rowed: 72,773

Total meters: 55,576.7

Completion Percentage: 100.0%

Name Meters Rowed % of Total Time Rowed Calories Burned
Jim Chimpsky 27,744 49.92% 3h 02m 33s 1,375
Ham the Ast-row Chimp 25,223 45.38% 2h 29m 42s 1,389
Oar-angutan 13,248 23.84% 1h 20m 36s 670
Mo Monkeys Mo Problems 6,558 11.8% 0h 35m 11s 340

Rowing the English Channel

People can swim this, right? Surely we can row it.

Dates: 2026-04-17 – 2026-04-23

Meters rowed: 44,270

Total meters: 43,050.6

Completion Percentage: 100.0%

Name Meters Rowed % of Total Time Rowed Calories Burned
Ham the Ast-row Chimp 24,240 56.31% 2h 24m 55s 1,304
Jim Chimpsky 20,030 46.53% 2h 11m 26s 980